Those who know me know I am all about the details. The color of thread on a shirt's hem, the pattern of a handbag's lining, the font of a bathroom cleanser's packaging—all those tiny details are often the difference between "eh" and "ooooh" with me. So when I was planning our wedding, I got giddy, and dizzy, over the details.

Throughout the planning, though, I kept them secret to maintain a little mystery for our guests. Now that we've lived through the big day, I can let the delicious details out of the bag.

the dress
I went to over a dozen dress shops and tried on several dozens of gowns before I found The One. I didn't realize that it would be so hard to find something that didn't weigh a ton, cost a fortune and look like a really bad prom dress, but it was. I had to remind myself that the dress size didn't define me--that I would, in fact, only be wearing it for one day. Just as I was about to give up, I found it: a Rivini strapless a-line gown in the most ethereal silk organza. I paired it with a veil and a demi-tiara made especially for me by the wonderful Carlyn Calloway. I could breathe, I could twirl and, best of all, I felt pretty.

Girly Details Horizontal pleats, vintage pearls, a row of buttons / Photo by Laura Kleger

the space
Once we decided to get married in LA, it was a given that the ceremony would be held at the church where Rama and I like to go. It's a beautiful space with a welcoming and vibrant community. We had no idea, however, where to hold the reception. So many spaces I'd checked out just didn't feel right. An aunt recommended I check out Calamigos Ranch, and I'm so glad I did. The Malibu Hills gem feels more magic forest than ranch, and the space we got was like our very own secret cottage. Rama and I loved it instantly.

The Oaks The entrance to our magic cottage. Flowers were in bloom and twinkly lights were strung everywhere. / Photo by Laura Kleger

the colors
Rama and I picked a pink-and-brown-and-white motif for a lot if reasons, but mostly because we love neopolitan ice cream. Yum!

the flowers
I had a fantastic florist on my side and free reign to do what I please. The main flowers were ranunculus and hydrangeas, with tulips, freesia and eucalyptus berry branches. I decided on vintage milk glass containers for the centerpieces and hanging vase and candles along the deck. The church was still covered in Easter blooms, but we added paper cones with freesia to line the aisle. It looked—and smelled—so good.

Pretty in Pink The flowers were so delicate and sweet. / Photo by Laura Kleger

the invitations
Rama and I both come from a family of artists, so there were a lot of offers to design our invitations. But that was one thing we knew we wanted to make ourselves. Rama and I share a love of children's literature, so it only seemed natural to use that as our concept. We started by drawing portraits of each other as children. Rama then inked and colored both to match. Those were our save-the-date cards. Rama drew the rest of the illustrations and I added them to the invitations, programs, table numbers, thank you cards and favors as I saw fit. It was a true collaboration, and it gave me confidence in our future collaborations as artists, writers and husband & wife.

First Impressions The front of our invitations read: "There once was a boy who met a girl." Lasting Impressions The inside reads: "That's how the story begins."

the cake
We taste-tested at every cupcake joint in LA, and Leda's Bake Shop made the most delicious and best dressed cupcakes by a landslider. We decided on a vintage porcelain figurine atop a 6-inch lemon cake atop a tower of mini cupcakes. The flavors: lemon, carrot, espresso, chocolate and vanilla. The verdict: divine.

Oh Yes A tower of delicious cupcakes. / Photo by Laura Kleger Up Close Three for you, three for me... / Photo by Laura Kleger

the favors
One of the hits of the party was our candy bar, a row of 5-gallon glass canisters filled with our favorite pink and brown candies. With stainless steel scoops and wax paper baggies at the guests' disposal, they could take as little or as much candy as they liked.

Enjoy Martha would be proud of the wedding favor display. / Photo by Laura Kleger

the extras
I knew the really little things might go unnoticed, but they mattered to me so I couldn't let them go. We named all the tables after children's books and displayed them at the reception, we hung wedding portraits of our family on one of the walls and my talented pal Kim helped me make our guestbook. I'm glad I did it all, because each touch added one more spark of magic to the day.

Guests I love the pink grosgrain ribbon tie closure. Open Book The title page reads: "We invite you to share your stories, wishes and words of wisdom with us. So much love & thanks."

ALL PHOTOS, EXCEPT FOR THE BLURRY ONES OF THE GUEST BOOK & INVITATIONS, WERE TAKEN BY OUR LOVELY PHOTOGRAPHER, LAURA KLEGER. SHE RULES THE SCHOOL.

wedding wrap-up: make it june 25 May 2006

Rama and I got engaged on May 1, 2005. We were on vacation in Portland, celebrating our 2-year anniversary. I had no idea that he'd be proposing to me that weekend, that I'd come home a bride-to-be. I was just happy to have made it as far as we had. I was in love.

My grandma was the first to hear the news. May 2nd was her birthday, so we called her in the Philippines from our hotel room. She was elated. "Are you saying this just because it's my birthday?"

When I assured Grandma that it wasn't a practical joke, that we were, in fact, getting married, she asked when the wedding would be. "I don't know yet."

She replied: "Make it June."

"This June?" I exclaimed. "That's next month!"

Let's Scram The Kennedy School makes hotel rooms out of old class rooms. We love the chalkboards.

I thought getting engaged would relieve all kinds of pressure from my family, but I was wrong. We just got a new kind of pressure. We had been getting gentle shoves to get married, but now we were getting orders to have babies right away. Babies? We hadn't even picked a date, yet! It was all overwhelming.

I've been in over a dozen weddings throughout my life, as a flower girl, bridesmaid and maid of honor, but nothing could have prepared me for being a bride. The only thing I knew for sure was I did not want to be a bridezilla. So I read a lot, I talked a lot, cried a lot and prayed a lot.

It saved me.

Throughout the planning, I received a lot of advice from a lot of people. Some of it helped. Some didn't. What helped me the most, though, was remembering that the decision making and silly bickering, the nervous laughs and hopeful tears, the grand ideas and the doubtful reservations all came from the same place—a place of love. While our parents, our family and our friends may not have had the same vision for the wedding, we all shared a genuine affection for one another. I knew we were off to a good start.

may 13, 2006 18 May 2006

may 13, 2006

We did it. We're married!

The wedding was, I have to say, pretty perfect. I feel a bit ridiculous typing that, but there truly was nothing more beautiful and sweet and fun we could have dreamed up. Every single detail was magic.

I am going to try to capture as much as I can in pictures and words -- and I'll share some of it with you, too -- in the next week or so. For now, though, I'm going to give my husband a kiss and fill up the tub.

color 21 March 2006

color, a quickie collage

Two and a half weeks later, and what do I have to show for it? One big to-do list slowly getting done, half of an a-line skirt sewn, a stack of wedding invitations, a pile of stuff for sale, a pile of stuff to pack, a happy client, a healthier me.

I keep telling myself to take it one day at a time and do the best that I can. If I do that much, I'm okay. I'm fine.

Thank goodness I have an army of support and love behind me. I am nourished by phone and email conversations with my girlfriends, dates with Rama, lunches with Rima and veg-out sessions at Mom & Dad's house. I am fed by a steady stream of music, a stack of magazines and vanilla-almond tea.

circus act 31 January 2006

circus act

The weekend was filled with movie watching, cake tasting, wedding planning, baby ogling, road tripping, family shuttling and somehow also couch surfing. And now, this week: a lot more of the same, with a healthy dose of deadline meeting mixed in. I feel a little like the girl teetering on the tower of circus performers, hoping for balance, calm, and a safe landing.

scavenger hunt 24 January 2006

the scavenger hunt

Over the weekend, Rama and I got roped into a lunchtime party at a Chinese restaurant. The food was great, but we didn't know that many people and we were preoccupied with all the to-do's we weren't checking off our list.

In my MSG-comatose state, I leaned over to Rama and whispered, "I'm bored."

"Me too," he admitted.

Rather than letting me wallow or whine, though, Rama came up with a brilliant idea: A photo scavenger hunt. On a piece of paper, he scrawled six items I had to photograph in 6 minutes.

I darted off with my camera, dodging tables and chairs, and snapped all the shots I needed. It was so much fun.

You can see the rest of the shots here.

re-creation 24 August 2005

Two of the quickie collages I made this afternoon, in my neverending quest to let go and get messy. "Don't think!" I kept reminding myself. "Just glue!"

My friend Christine came over today and, after having a lovely breakfast at one of my favorite neighborhood spots, we made a glorious mess in the afternoon sun. It was so much fun.

I forget how important it is to do that—not just to make art and make a mess, but to do it side by side with another colorful soul. Sometimes, there's chatter between creating ("Can I borrow a stamp pad?" and "Here, have some glitter tape."), but there can also be complete and utter silence. Both are so nice. Both make the experience.

I broke in a new sketchbook, and it was kind of exhilarating. I've always loved the promise of a blank page, but now I'm also learning to appreciate the beauty of one filled with scribbles, blotches and brilliant, messy color.

It's true 29 November 2004

My lovely birthday cake (it's an ice cream cake!) courtesy darling Rama. I got two cakes, actually. The other, from my parents, was a strawberry shortcake. What a lucky gal.

"I'm getting older every day," Sidra said. "How do we stop this?"

"We don't," I told her. "We just don't let it stop us."

Sugar hangover 01 November 2004

Me as Chas Tenenbaum, from The Royal Tenenbaums. Rima was a demented prom queen, Henry was a Hasidic Jew and Rama was a kid dressed up as Superman.

It took me 1 1/2 hours and half a can of hairspray to curl my hair last night, and I still looked more Shirley Temple than Ben Stiller. Still, my costume got a couple laughs and kept me comfy the whole night.

We played pop culture trivial pursuit and stuffed our faces with all sorts of treats while we waited for kids to come by. Whenever the doorbell rang, all activity stopped and one of us darted to the door with the gigantic bowl of candy. The rest of us watched, cackled and cooed, which probably ended up being more scary than we'd intended. We were just so darned excited.

We were visited by a sumo wrestler, a couple spidermans, a few ninjas, a handful of teddy bears and several princesses. I wanted to squeeze the cheeks of every last one of them.

Today, I've got a sugar hangover and a daunting to-do list. Mondays are like this.

p.s. If you dressed up and took pictures of your costume, it's not too late to join Penelope's Costume Contest.

Gnome labor 15 October 2004

This is one generous and hardworking gnome, Taschen bookstore, Beverly Hills

"Just so you know, you can't take pictures inside the store," said the black-clad guy behind the counter.

I took a step toward the front door and smiled, "That's fine. I just wanted a picture of this little guy."

Wine & cheese 24 September 2004

A gorgeous spread of wine, cheese & fruit at Seth & Stella's

My friends and I have been indulging ourselves. We play poker, drink beer and eat doritos. We sit at our new favorite outdoor café, drink coffee and split a slice of chocolate cheesecake. We celebrate the middle of the week with wine, cheese and fresh fruit. And, throughout it all, we share stories, listen to music and laugh until our bellies ache.

Whether we hang out on a weekend or a weeknight, at my place or one of theirs, for a several minutes or a couple hours, I end the night with a smile. I love my little tribe of friends, and I love the time we spend together.

When we grow up and fall into routines, it becomes harder to find the time to get together. But when I do, I get so much joy for such little effort. It's worth it. I have to remember that.

This is not ice cream 18 August 2004

11 of 98 flavors of gelato (I think I tasted 6) at my new favorite spot, Angelato Café, Santa Monica

Hope in the flowers 13 July 2004

All photos taken in Mom's garden last Saturday

There's hope in flowers and sunsets and phone calls with people who love you. Everything is as it should be, they say. Trust that.

Lazy and lovely 06 July 2004

Rama plays Sungka in Mom & Dad's lovely backyard, this lazy 4th of July weekend

Other weekend indulgences: Reading comics in Griffith Park, a delicious afternoon nap, an IKEA shopping spree, barbecued ribs and mini ice cream sandwiches, Shrek 2 at the local theater (courtesy of free movie passes) and Pass the Pigs, a new favorite

How did you indulge yourself this weekend?

The place where I came from 18 June 2004

This time, I tried to see everything with new eyes. I've been back to the Philippines at least a dozen times since we left in 1976. It's less like a vacation, I tried to explain to co-workers and friends, and more like going to Grandma's house. Grandma's house just happens to be 7,000 miles away.

I took photos at things that normally wouldn't make me blink twice. Fruit and foliage, signs and buildings, chairs and stairways. Everyday sights that feel like the Philippines, that feel far away and unlike my world back home. With over 200 shots, I'm certain I barely touched the surface, but at least it's my view of the surface. Here are 34 photos of the place where I came from.

>> LAUNCH PHILIPPINES PHOTO ALBUM<<

Whereabouts 10 June 2004

26 May 2004 | A roadtrip arm-out-the-van-window shot of the Pacific Ocean as we drive south of Manila to Grandma's house in Bicol. The roads were rough, but the sea looked calm.

* * *

I'm back, refreshed and recharged, slightly changed and hugely inspired, and mostly, oh mostly, incredibly moved -- whether to tears or to roaring laughter -- by my faraway family.

Whenever I leave home for awhile, I begin to remember what's really important. What moves me. Who matters most. It tumbles forth when I'm looking out a plane window, walking down a crowded street or lying in a stranger's bed. It's as if leaving is the only way to discover where I've been.

Shining and willing 06 April 2004

The trees in my backyard are in full bloom.

"All my life -- so far -- I have loved best how the flowers rise and open, how the pink lungs of their bodies enter the fore of the world and stand there shining and willing..." --Mary Oliver

Lemonade stand 30 March 2004

Media-savvy, non-profit worker bees on a Sunday afternoon

Good hair day 09 March 2004

Several inches of my hair got lopped off this weekend. I'd let my hair go long the past couple months just to see what it would look like. It was the longest it's been since junior high. It was fun to wear ponytails, pigtails and buns, but soon that was all I was wearing. My hair took forever to blow dry and strangled me in my sleep. I made a hair appointment with Matt to stop the insanity. When Matt finished, he smiled and let out a sigh of relief. "Back to normal!" I looked at my reflection, then him, quizzically. "Normal? I haven't had hair this short in so long, it doesn't feel normal. But it does feels good."

Dad 07 March 2004

Dad and me, ca. 1979

When I was little, I used to sing a song to my dad. "Daddy Cool, Daddy Cool, Cool, Cool Daddy!" My mom would lead and I'd follow along. I thought it was something we wrote together, until this year, when I saw it on a Karaoke playlist.

Still, my dad really is one of the coolest guys I know. He can light up a room with his cheery disposition. He can make you laugh with his silly jokes. He can make you feel secure just by letting you put your head on his shoulder. I love him like crazy.

Today is his birthday, and I am celebrating the coolest dad in the world.

Happy Birthday, Dad.

Mom 23 February 2004

Mom, Tom, Ricky and me, Griffith Park, ca. 1977

Today is my mom's birthday, and I am showering her with telepathic hugs and kisses. She's in Florida right now, spending time with girlfriends.

My mom is a fox, an angel, a princess and a superhero all rolled up in one, and I love her like mad.

Happy birthday, mom.

Little Ha 10 February 2004

I met Miha on a job interview--hers, not mine. I was hiring freelancers for a web project I was heading, and she was one of the interviewees. After talking to her for a couple minutes, I knew I liked her. The New Yorker was sweet, funny and ridiculously talented. Although fashion photography clearly her passion, she had done exactly the kind of web production work that we needed help doing. There was just one problem: She was overqualified.

I was afraid that if I hired her she would get bored and abandon ship, but she assured me she would stick it out. I took that chance, and she didn't let me down. And after the contract ended, we remained friends. Lucky me!

Miha kisses Roger

Finally, Miha has gotten her photos up on the Web so that you can see how fantastic she is. So, go on. Show the girl some love.

Let it snow 29 January 2004

Mom and me, Big Bear Mountain, ca. 1980

I know I don't know what cold really is. I've lived in Southern California most of my life, and I can probably count the times I've seen the snow on my fingertips. I don't know how it feels to bundle up head to toe. I have never had to worry about my car getting buried alive. I don't know what below zero even means.

Still, I daydream of marching home down icy paths, making snow angels and tossing snowballs at friends, and waking up in the morning to find the whole world covered in a blanket of blinding white.

Say yes 21 January 2004

Wall for rent, off Melrose Ave.

Gray skies are gonna clear up 16 January 2004

View from the Getty Center lawn

There was one day last month when, if you stood at just the right spot at just the right time, you could see all the way to downtown Los Angeles and the Pacific Ocean without turning your head or squinting your eyes.

The tangled highways, towering buildings and endless ocean were right there, within your reach, waiting for you.

Childlike wonder 14 January 2004

The Wound & Wound Toy Co., Melrose Ave.

"We do not stop playing because we grow old.
We grow old because we stop playing."

Rockin' around the Christmas tree 18 December 2003

Rima and I rescued a tree from the lot last night. He is so Charlie Brown Christmas Tree that we fell in love instantly.

We had to take him home.

LAUNCH PHOTO ALBUM

You belong in the zoo, the San Diego Zoo 14 October 2003

Our Saturday was half road trip, half field trip. Rama, Sidra and I drove a couple hundred miles to the San Diego Zoo. They played Connect Four, while I bopped my head to the Shins. We took turns dancing and making faces at people passing by on the freeway.

At the zoo, we picked out our favorite animals and studied their faces with pen and paper. I imagined what life was like behind those fences and, while lounging around in the sunshine didn't look so bad, I decided we were far better off on this side of the fence.

>> LAUNCH A DAY AT THE SAN DIEGO ZOO<<

The blue period 20 February 2003

walls painted like skies at the blueberry cafe

mirror mirror on the wall, who's the blurriest of them all?

"goodbye," says the suitcase to the chair. "i'm leaving you."

lightspeed ahead, or faster than normal on my way home

all photos taken with lomo lc-a, test roll #2, and an unsteady hand

The proud aunt 18 November 2002

i've borrowed a puppy to shamelessly plug, since i don't have one of my own. everybody, meet esther, quite possibly the world's sassiest dog ever.

He loves me, he loves me not 08 October 2002

a summer's day at the local nursery (?)

Three skies 24 September 2002

Will the real Wonder Woman stand up? 13 July 2002

the resemblance is striking, no?

this morning, i rescued wonder woman from a yard sale. she was trapped in a mattel box on a dusty shelf in a dirty yard, and i had to take her home with me. it seemed a funny twist of fate as just last week i'd been reminiscing about my stint as a superhero. my parents refused to buy me wonder woman underoos, so my big brothers helped put together The Outfit, complete with construction paper head- and wrist-bands, a yellow yarn lasso and pink halter top. alas, i had no boots or cape, but that didn't stop me from riding around in my big wheel, battling evil in my neighborhood.

Caught in New York 16 May 2002

i miss new york, already. i miss the subways and rows of trees and slices of piping hot pizza and photobooth bars, but mostly i just miss my friends.

>> LAUNCH NEW YORK PHOTO ALBUM<<

Up where the air is clear 29 April 2002

if you ask me how we got there, i couldn't tell you. my eyes were shut the whole way. once or twice, someone would ask, "is christine asleep?"

"no," i'd mutter. and then i'd adjust my pillow and drift back into semi-consciousness.

i only opened them when i heard paul tell chris we missed the turn. we spun back around and approached a street i'd been down a dozen times. suddenly, i was 16, riding in a bus that shook with teenage voices and hormones, on my way to a church retreat.

from our porch, i could see the fence i climbed, the fence that led up the mountain and guarded the lake, the lake where we skipped rocks with boys who caught our eyes.

outside, the clouds hung low. inside, the lamp was just as dim.

we sat on ratty couches, played board games, sipped cranberry juice concoctions and listened to the hip-hop hits of the '80s. we made fun of cosmo, but read it anyway. we walked and walked and walked, met a bookstore owner from austria, walked and walked, bought some trinkets from a leather good shop, walked some more, and laughed so hard i thought my cheeks would explode. we watched almost famous until the scene where kate hudson tells patrick fugit about morocco and he scurries away because we couldn't keep our eyes open any longer. i climbed up to the top bunk and slid inside my sleeping bag.

sunday morning, i saw a bluebird, just a few shades darker than the sky. you don't see birds like that in the city. had i not been looking closely enough, i might have missed it entirely.

Spring sprang sprung 21 April 2002

spring is here. sunlight is flooding back into the house, waking me up early and dragging me out of bed. the air is tinged with sweetness, of flowers blooming and fresh fruit falling. plans are being thrown out the window and adventure is waiting. spring is grabbing hold of my hand and calling me outside.

(i'm coming.)

Been all over the place 20 March 2002

this weekend, i did not once think about you, obsess about my appearance or wish i were somewhere else. i did go to disneyland, take cabs to get around town, and jump up and down to some damn good rock & roll.

surprises, everywhere.

like when you suddenly realize that somebody else is watching you, the way you are watching the world.

(clockwise: me, fixing a broken jacket zipper, while waiting for a rock show; me, stepping out on a sunny afternoon; me, trying desperately to pay attention.)

Red light, green light 18 February 2002

i went for a drive today, rolled my windows down and turned the volume up and cruised on sunset boulevard. i was alone, but sitting shotgun were three cameras: a holga, a polaroid, a digital. i didn't really have a destination in mind. i just knew that it was a holiday and the sky was blue, and i couldn't let it go to waste.

while sitting at a stoplight, i decided to play a game. at every red light, i had to take a photo. i could extend my arm as far as it would go out the window, but i could not look through the viewfinder. the less thought put into the shot the better. it was so much fun that i started to prefer red lights over green, and i drove more slowly in hopes of catching them, and i pitied the people beside me in traffic who pushed on the gas as soon as they could, because they were missing the beauty all around them.

oh hello, that is me. my hair is in my eye. the palm trees are everywhere, towering high above the city. mr. balloon man came out of nowhere, and i don't know where he is headed. the metro station is silver and shiny, but the bus is hogging the spotlight. on the left, it says, "human hair," and below that, "clearance." president's day sale? curb, grass, sidewalk, fence: the sedimentary layers of the streets. i must confess, this is a non-stoplight photo, but it's the shakespeare bridge! my heart swells each time i cross it. blue sky. green palm. beautiful day.

My old friend 11 January 2002

this is los angeles, as seen driving down the 101 one gray day in november. it makes me nostalgic, and i'm not sure for what. like the photograph of an old friend or lover.

is that what the city has become to me?

Don't let me forget again 12 October 2001

it is just the internet. there is more to life than <href>s and <p> tags, titles and teasers, comps and sitemaps. if a line break breaks the page, it is not the end of the world.

i have been so wrapped up in work, and i have let it get to me -- i've found myself becoming bitter and drab and just plain horrid. i don't know what is going on in our world right now. i don't even know what is going on in my life.

i vaguely remember a wonderful sunday brunch, though. i remember being poured a mimosa and kicked out of my kitchen so that two lads could play iron chef. i remember the smell of blueberry muffins and fresh coffee. i remember the sun flooding into my dining room and lighting up our day.

it feels so long ago, but it was just last weekend, and suddenly, it's the weekend again. it's kind of scary, how that happens. how time just disappears. this weekend, i'm working some more, but i won't let it get the best of me. there may not be another lovely brunch, but there will be something else, something to make me smile, something that reminds me that i am alive.

3,000 words 07 September 2001

i want to hide behind my viewfinder and capture the world in a snap.

what is it about photographs that i love so much? it's a reality that i cannot avoid. when i look in the mirror, i might not see what you see. but when i look at a photograph, it's right there. in front of you and me.

sunset boulevard

dirty pigeons

sunbleached patio

(these photos were taken with my new-ish holga camera sometime this summer. you can see more, if you like.)

Open house 12 June 2001

so this. this is where i live.

that's our front porch. one afternoon, i'm going to wipe down the chair and set a table out there and sit with a book and a cup of something and watch everyone on the street. that's our big window that i stare out of when i'm sitting in the big green chair. on a clear day you can see the Hollywood sign; every other day you can see our flowering trees out back. that's a close-up of our lovely hardwood floors, uh, you know, just because.

and then there's the kitchen. i am in love with my kitchen. the first week i moved in, i just stood there and gazed at the glass cabinets. there's another big window and an antique-ish stove, oh, and one of those ironing boards that comes out of the walls like in the movies. and that's my bedroom. my aunt made that quilt for me when i graduated from school. it's all stars. the paintings from left to right are "coffee & cigarettes," by me; "le petit prince," bought for 10 francs at a paris subway; and an untitled sketch by my brother ricky that i stole from my parents' house. the photo of my desk turned out too dark, otherwise i'd show you.

yup. that's my new place, give or take a few hundred square feet.

A lack of patience, among other things 27 March 2001

it seems to me that if i were to stick just to one thing, i could make it work. a painting, a photograph, a story. any one thing. but my mind leaps from idea to another as if they were rooftops on a warm summer's night.

(photographs, especially, make me happy today. color and shine and blurry edges. like these.)

i am too fickle, i think. i give in to my cravings too easily. i fall in love with everything all at the same time. i dream in billions of dazzling colors and when i awake i remember not a one.